Roxxon wages a hostile takeover against Thor + Marvel this spring

The Roxxon Age of Comics is upon us.

Thor will get a corporate makeover of sorts in April, as Marvel’s longtime evil oil company, Roxxon Energy Corporation, “takes over” Marvel in April and releases their own Thor comic.

Roxxon Presents: Thor is a one-shot by current Immortal Thor writer Al Ewing and, probably the perfect artist for a project like this, Greg Land. Roxxin’ Thor will “be there to defend big business and the sanctity of shareholder value,” as he smashes woke environmentalists at the bequest of longtime Thor villain and Roxxon CEO Dario Agger, a.k.a. the Minotaur.

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Here’s a quote from Ewing on the project, with Roxxon’s redactions:

“Roxxon’s hostile takeover of Marvel Comics is the worse thing to happen to the industry in decades just what comic books needed! I was horrified jazzed beyond words when I saw how the so-called Roxxon Entertainment Standards Committee had gutted improved my work, methodically stripping away every iota of poetry, symbolism and metaphor junk no one cares about. The result is a comic that can best be described as an act of unforgivable violence against the medium I love a rollicking good time for the whole familyMay God forgive Roxxon, for I never shall! Make Mine Roxxon!”

Here’s the description for Roxxon Presents: Thor:

in the OFFICIAL Thor title presented by Roxxon, meet the Roxxin’ Thor! In his secret identity as A.I. spokesguru Chad Hammer, the son of Odin knows Mama Gaea is a TOP PRIORITY for heroes AND for business! But when a group of insane environmental activists take “saving the Earth” TOO FAR, it’s time to show them the wisdom on both sides—as Thor! But which God of Evil is prompting the kids to rebel? Could it be…LOKI, GOD OF EVIL??? Featuring an all-star cast of heroes! MINOTAUR! EXECUTIONER! ENCHANTRESS! And the THOR-TRUCK! This is the story of THE ROXXIN’ THOR… and it’s a VITAL part of the “ABSOLUTE ABSOLUTION” MEGA-EVENT!

While the fake Thor is battling environmentalists, the real Thor has his hands full in April with the Enchantress:

Over in IMMORTAL THOR #9, Ewing will continue his work with artist Ibraim Roberson as they bring in THE ENCHANTRESS! The Son of Odin goes to the corporate headquarters of Roxxon—to make war for the sake of the Earth herself. But his enemies are waiting to steal from him the one thing that was Thor’s alone… and they have crafted the foulest of weapons to do it. This is the story of THE IMMORTAL THOR… and of the trap he cannot escape. And if you didn’t follow any of that, just check out the glorious cover by Alex Ross now!

Look for Immortal Thor #9 on April 3 and Roxxon Presents: Thor on April 18. All of this is leading into an event called “Absolute Absolution,” which I’m sure we’ll get some more details on soon.

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